This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
