Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Randomize
