you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize