You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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