i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
