Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
