I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
