Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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