Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
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Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
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and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"