I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?