garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
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