Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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