my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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