i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
So squirting runs in the family.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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