Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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