You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize