She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
