What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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