i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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