when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
