maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Randomize