garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
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