Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
