I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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