i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
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I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
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Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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