he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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