doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
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