I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
My penis needs a shock collar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize