So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
