bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
What did we do last night that was yellow?
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize