would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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