her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
