question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Randomize
