I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize