FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
The air was thick with penises
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
