And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
