i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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