so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize