dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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