I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
thus making me awesome and them whores
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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