I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
So much rum. So many feels.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
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