i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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