At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
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Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
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Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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