Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
