i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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