My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
