:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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