the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Randomize
