We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
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