PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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