O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize