Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
