Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i just google imaged poop.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
